I Can’t Find A Job

Overeducated, under experienced, and unemployed

The Math Riddle

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As I aimlessly stood around at work trying to pass the endless hours by thinking in my head, I noticed a lady approaching me.

“How many times does 16 go into 70?” asks an older well-dressed black lady.


Having a flashback to my high school Latin class, I remember learning about the Sphinx. This mythological creature was a lion with a woman’s head and upper body. Legend has it that the Sphinx sat outside Thebes and asked a riddle to all that passed by. If a traveler failed to correctly answer the question, the Sphinx would eat them.

Fearing the Sphinx has crossed paths with me, I gulp and answer. “About 4 and a half times,” I say.

“That’s what I was thinking but I was looking for something more specific,” replies the lady.

Still not understanding why I’m engaging in this ladies math riddle while still having the desire not to get eaten, I grab a calculator and roll my eyes and say, “4.375.”

“Okay, so what would that be in money?”

“$4.38,” I answer.

“No, no, no, that’s impossible. That’s too much money…$4.38 times 70 is too much money,” the lady barks. “This is a good exercise for you, let’s keeping going.”

“Umm…okay. It’s about $300,” I say, growing confused and more frustrated.

“$4.38 times 70 is too much money, it doesn’t make any sense!”

“OKAY! I have no idea what you are talking about!”

“There’s an item over there for $16 and it has 70 pieces. I want to know how much each item is!”

“Ohhh, that’s not how you do it, (JACKASS), you divide $16 by 70, which is about 23 cents a item,” I say.

“Ok.” The lady begins walking away, apparently satisfied by the answer to the incoherent, elementary school math riddle she posed for me.

A better job can’t come soon enough!


Written by icantfindajob

February 14, 2009 at 8:09 pm

Posted in Hell

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